Dear Ole Ma

Of the many thing my mother taught me the most important were the following:

1. If you are having your picture taken be sure to proudly display whatever beverage you are drinking at the time. You’ll never know when Rolling Rock will be looking for a new spokesperson.
2. If you are going to grow marijuana, grow big – none of this three plants in a closet nickel and dime bullshit. And make sure your crop is only accessible by motorcycle.
3. This one is the most important. Never, ever go outside without your helmet on.

Take these little nuggets of wisdom to heart my friends. They could save you life some day.